The Learning Curve

Lessons I've Learned from being Sick:

1. Always listen to your body, if it tells you something is wrong follow the trail

2. If you feel repelled by something food or medicine don't take it. Your body is speaking listen.

3. Dr.'s are human and they can make mistakes too

4. Being sick is the best time to connect with who you really are

5. Life always has a way of humbling you

6. Be patient

7. Be kind, especially to yourself

8. It's ok to be selfish sometimes

9. Surrender

10. Don't apologize for being sick

11. People will leave you, not because your sick but because they are meant to

12. Feel, feel everything, feel sad, feel mad, feel frustrated, feel empowered, feel lonely, but feel

13. Being sick is a lesson in disguise, be grateful you get to be a student

14. Laugh, because even though your sick your still alive

15. Be grateful

I don't have solid answers just yet from doctors but it's safe to say I'm not depressed or feeling anxiety. 90% of women's heart problems are often misdiagnosed because we don't have the same symptoms as men. Things are being sorted out and sometimes I feel like talking about it and sometimes I don't feel like talking about it. I appreciate the love and support but sometimes it's hard to answer questions when I don't have answers myself. So I'm still alive, I'm on bed rest until further notice. Some days I'm really tired, some days I feel a little better. It depends and I'm not quite sure on what? What I know for sure is no caffeine, no exercise, no stress, just patience and love ❤️

Support Your Local Poets

After being mesmerized by the words of poet Warsan Shire in Beyonce's Lemonade. I can't help but think of poets in my community, poets that look and sound like me. Poets that don't look and sound like me. I had forgotten how touching words can be when spoken out loud.

Frida

"Tú mereces lo mejor de lo mejor, porque tú eres una de esas pocas personas que, en este mísero mundo siguen siendo honestas consigo mismas y esa es la única cosa que realmente cuenta."

I'm Sorry

Sometimes we get so caught up waiting for an apology, we forget to ask for forgiveness. There is a certain courage you have to muster, to own up to your mistakes, to own up to the parts of you that may not be so easy to love.. This morning I had to ask someone for forgiveness, and it's scary. It's an apology I've been putting off bc I've had to own up to things I'm not so proud of but I thought what's worse... Feeling the fear and doing it anyways, or having the weight of it crush me every day I don't do it? Having the weight and possible regret of not being promised tomorrow? The death of Prince broke my heart and reminded me that I really don't know how much time I have. That people that come into my life can be gone from one day to the next... What's more important?

50 Ways to Practice Self Love

Loving myself looks like... Making better choices.

It's surrounding myself with people and relationships that uplift me. It's making choices that may seem selfish to others, but are satisfying to me. It's making time to meditate, read and write daily. It's allowing myself to be sad or disappointed if I feel like it. It's knowing that I'm worthy of love at every point in my journey. Its being able to toot my own horn without any apologies or making myself small to keep others comfortable. It's learning to be self reliant but also knowing it's ok to lean on people who love me. It's learning to forgive so that I can remember the past without pain. It's having a PH.D. in me so that I can love people in my life from a place of love and not fear. Self love liberates, empowers, and gives so much more than anything that comes from self hate.

I didn't always function from a place of loving myself, and truth be told it's an on going journey. I was constantly hurt, betrayed, and feeling victimized, one factor was always the same... me. It was a hard pill to swallow but I knew I couldn't keep living my life this way. Here are 50 ways I personally practiced loving myself over the last year:

1. Get proper sleep
2. Eat food that nourishes you
3. Be physically active
4. Know your boundaries, and make them known
5. Have friends that love you unconditionally
6. Read a book
7. Meditate
8. Go dancing
9. Forgive yourself
10. Clean your closet
11. Donate clutter
12. Compliment yourself
13. Get really good at something, like really good
14. Stop comparing
15. End relationships that make you feel like your hard to love
16. Write yourself a love letter
17. Laugh
18. Make a list of your best qualities
19. Unplug from the world
20. Journal
21. Do that thing you've been putting off
22. Clean out your phone, and your email while your at it
23. Create art
24. Forgive others
25. Be kind to yourself
26. Go to a concert
27. Learn to say no
28. Reach out to people who love you
29. Get a haircut
30. Validate yourself
31. Try something new
32. Travel
33. Celebrate your accomplishments
34. Have a daily spiritual practice
35. Moisturize
36. Drink Tea or Coffee
37. Find your happy place
38. Use positive affirmations
39. Get emotional, stop numbing
40. Surrender
41. Go to therapy
42. Be patient
43. You are exactly where you're supposed to be
44. Listen to your intuition
45. Be grateful
46. Tell people how you feel about them
47. Listen to your favorite songs
48. Buy a new outfit
49. Be financially healthy
50. Bake cookies

Some of these might be easier than others, but I can promise you, your not alone in this. Were all working towards the same destination just having different journeys. Just start and you'll quickly see how the worlds changes in front of your eyes. What does self love look like to you?